Thicket

“If only I remembered to pack my lawn mower.”

Divergence of the Undergrad

I won’t make a claim for this joke. I first heard it from one of my professors, and haven’t forgotten it since.

Patching

“If you want the full service, I can even adjust the seat post!”

Forgetful

I kid you not, this actually happened.

Non-Conservative

We reward those who do good throughout the whole semester versus those who peak at the end, even though the end result is the same.

Sweeping

And then a few days later, we ask for an explanation once again.

Hunting

“Don’t be scared, you want to be the right sign anyway.”

Reading

“How many books did you read this year?”

“Just one, but it was an advanced mathematics book.”

“Oh wow, that’s worth like fifty books!”

Mental Visualization

“It’s good to be able to visualize things in your mind.”

“That’s what I’m doing. But I think my brain processes better with pictures.”

Computation

“How are you going to run that computer without it losing power?”

“I didn’t think of that.”

“I guess you would have needed the key to wisdom to figure out a better strategy, huh?”